Remember these:
She will come to you if you are NOT miserable.
She will come to you if she is NOT your only option.
She will come to you if you are NOT trying to fix things.
She will come to you if you are NOT stuck thinking about what you had.
She will come to you if you are strong.
She will come to you if you are grounded and self-sufficient.
She will come to you if you are living your life, focused forward, and checking in lightly without agenda.
She will come to you if you are NOT stuck in the middle of the maze.
She will come to you only if she sees massive potential for a great relationship with you.
In other words:
She will NOT come to you if you are miserable.
She will NOT come to you if she is your only option.
She will NOT come to you if you are trying to fix things.
She will NOT come to you if you are stuck thinking about what you had.
She will NOT come to you if you are weak or emotionally collapsed.
She will NOT come to you if you are dependent or ungrounded.
She will NOT come to you if your life is paused and centered around her.
She will NOT come to you if you are checking in with an agenda or pressure.
She will NOT come to you if you are stuck in the middle of the maze.
She will NOT come to you if she does not see massive potential for a great relationship with you.
After she’s gone, there’s a phase when she’s not around. This is when your mind gets the loudest and pushes you to do things you’ll regret. Remember, what you’re feeling is not an accurate compass for deciding what to do next. Nothing you feel right now is a reliable guide for your next move.
What you are experiencing is like coming out of a serious car crash. Your body is shaking, your senses are distorted, and everything feels urgent and dangerous. That does not mean the road is still unsafe. It means your system is reacting to impact. If you try to make life-changing decisions while in shock, you will make the wrong ones. Calm the system first. Clarity comes after.
The sooner you do this, the sooner the nightmare ends.
That means you either get her back, or the pain turns into joy with someone else.
Here is the golden nugget that will forever set you free:
Poor self-regulation (Lack of awareness and control over your negative emotions)
Is the reason she is not here.
Is the reason you are fucked right now.
Is the reason most guys never recover and their life sucks
This is about acting insecure without knowing it, anger, sadness, jealousy, fear of loss, weakness, regret, and overthinking.
Sadly most guys do not even see this and keep dwelling.
On the other hand emotional awareness and control will immediately set you free. This means recognise your nervous system is a separate entity from you. You can control it. You can manipulate it for better or worse.
Here, your logistics and mental power are the game changers. The more confident you are, the sooner you start fighting back. That means actively regulating your thoughts and emotions. The weaker you are, the more you sit with those thoughts and emotions and keep rehashing the past.
I want you to know I have done both.
After my divorce about 16 years ago, I smoked an average of 10 joints a day (pure weed) for almost six months.
After my most recent breakup last year, 48 hours after she left, I met someone hotter and more connected. I did not touch any substances, except some pills for sleep for a few nights.
The point I am making here is this: you can hurt much less if you increase how well you regulate your system and what you do every day.
Go full attack more. Every scond monitor and discard the bad thoughts and emotions. Do not visit the past. Work your vision for next few dats and weeks. Build your army. Gym heavy weights, ice plunge, cold approach, you know the list.